erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
