I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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