you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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