If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
