God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
