Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize