with your own penis?
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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