Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
