Where did you get a picture of my penis
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
