If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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