so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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