The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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