Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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