NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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