Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Randomize
