No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
