420 ftw
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
