the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
