He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize