glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
