i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
