hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
