I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize