i jhust puked up my retainher.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
where are my eyebrows?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize