Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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