Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Life is so much better after having sex.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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