she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
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