I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
