I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Green mimosas i think yes
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
40s are totally the cure
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
