We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Randomize
