Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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