It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
