You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize