It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize