So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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