she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Actions speak louder than pants.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Randomize
