I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
