Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?