New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
