so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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