HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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