I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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