He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize