he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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