I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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