one two three fourrrrnication!
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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