I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
