You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize