Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
