Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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